A few weeks after writing about Learning NVC through the body, I heard this quote from Marshall Rosenberg – the creator of Nonviolent Communication – where he talks about empathy:

“Empathy, I would say is presence. Pure presence to what is alive in a person at this moment, bringing nothing in from the past. … If you surf, you’d be better at empathy because you will have built into your body what it is about. Being present and getting in with the energy that is coming through you in the present. It is not a mental understanding. … In empathy, you don’t speak at all. You speak with the eyes. You speak with the body. If you say any words at all, it’s because you are not sure you are with the person. So you may say some words. But the words are not empathy. Empathy is when the other person feels the connection to with what’s alive in you.” (You can listen to the interview here.)